The Bachelorette recap: Big indecision in the Big Easy

This week on The Bachelorette, a trip to the Big Easy came with Big Indecision for Charity, and with hometown dates right around the corner, ish started to get very real.

Let's recap!

Our final six arrive in New Orleans and are ready to let the good times roll. How is it possible that we're already down to the final six? It feels like this season is flying by.

Dotun, Xavier, Sean, Aaron, Tanner, and Joey are sharing a cool beverage at Café Beignet when Charity arrives. Aaron, who has lived in New Orleans for seven years, is hoping he gets the one-on-one so he can show the Bachelorette "the city that made me a man." (Um… is it me or does that sound a little weird? Don't answer that.) Sorry, pal, but it's Joey who'll be spending the day in this man-making city with Charity via a romantic carriage ride.

The red-hoofed mule pulls the Bachelorette farther and farther away from the disappointed men, who admit to feeling "sad" (Sean) and "overlooked" (Tanner). Joey, meanwhile, is loving life. "Charity, like, seriously, I can't believe how comfortable I feel around you," he gushes, as they ride through the narrow New Orleans streets. "I just miss you. Whenever I see you, I'm just excited to get more time with you."

I've gotta say, these two are pretty cute together. Of course, I think Joey is correct when says Charity is "too smart" for him. Could this super chill, Hawaii-based tennis pro and our highly intelligent, Georgia-based child and family therapist really make it work long-term? The Bachelorette seems to think it's possible. "I just love everything about him," she says. "He's open. He's a great communicator, and with him, I really do feel really safe."

Charity and Joey sample some local cuisine, get their tarot cards read, and dance to the music of a jazz band. It's all very, very cute. The whole street-poet thing was a little too cringy for me, so let's skip right past it and save ourselves the secondhand embarrassment. (Watching Charity and Joey smooch and smooch and smooch while the poet guy was sitting right there almost made me pass out from discomfort.)

At dinner, Charity brings up the elephant in the room — hometown dates — and he says his family would be "excited" to have him bring home someone who he cares about "so deeply." That's all well and good, but there's also the other elephant in the room: "I want to know how you feel about being in an interracial relationship," says Charity. She goes on to explain that in her past relationship, which was also interracial, she and her boyfriend would face "unfortunate" reactions when they went out together — and he simply didn't take those things seriously enough to make her feel supported.

Joey, bless him, admits that he can't fully understand what it must be like to be placed in those uncomfortable situations. What Charity wants is a partner who will embrace all aspects of her, including the challenges she faces while navigating the world as a Black woman, and Joey seems to get it. "I have never dated a Black woman, and the idea of bringing you home — I know my family," says Joey. "They understand that love is love. They truthfully look at what's on the inside."

Still, Joey knows that there's a lot he doesn't know. "I don't think it's something I'll be able to learn until we try to conquer that together," he says. "I never want you to doubt that I can be someone like that for you." Awww, man, this conversation is so sweet. Charity is moved to tears. "Thanks," she whispers. "That means a lot." As tears start to roll down her face, Joey offers her a hug. Go ahead and cry that makeup all over his nice blue shirt, Charity — Joey doesn't give a hoot!

You know what happens next, rose lovers:

Congrats, Joey! Secure in the knowledge that he's going to hometowns, Joey offers up the first "I'm falling in love with you" of the season. And Charity feels the same. Man, even though Dotun is still my top pick, Joey took a big leap forward on this date. I might even support him as… the next Bachelor?

Sorry, I'm getting ahead of things. Let's check back in at the hotel, where the guys are anxiously awaiting the next date card. Dotun retrieves it from the Accent Table of Doom and reads off the name… Sorry, names.

Oh, snap! A two-on-one date in the bayou! We haven't had a two-on-one in the bayou since Corinne and Taylor nearly fed each other to the gators during Nick's season of The Bachelor. This should be interesting.

Of course, neither Tanner nor Sean is psyched about this, but the former is handling it better than the latter. "I'm confused. I'm upset. I'm bummed. I'm pissed," says Sean with a sigh. "This is f---ing bulls---, dude." Sure is! But it's bulls--- you signed up for. Now go pack your suitcase and get ready to face the awkward music.

Charity meets them in the bayou, where a nice man called Captain Tom takes the trio out on his boat for a swamp tour. "Y'all out with the same girl right here?" the cap'n asks Tanner and Sean. "I'm not sure how that's gonna work." It's not, Captain Tom! That's the whole point!

Everyone's trying to make the best of the situation as they float down the river looking at alligators. Sean's gone into "competition" mode, talking a lot and trying to monopolize Charity's attention. Seeing this, Tanner determines that he's to "step up" his game and make a move. Even Captain Tom thinks the Bachelorette is leaning more toward Sean. "She giggled more with him," he notes, adding that if Charity doesn't choose either one, "I'm over here." Captain Tom for Bachelor? I'd watch it.

After the boat ride and a huge pile of crawfish and corn, Charity asks the men to join her for dinner later that night. Once again, Sean shows more initiative, interrupting Charity's interview with a producer to say goodbye for the afternoon.

Come ON, Tanner! You better do a few shots of espresso before dinner because right now, you might as well be sleepwalking.

That night, the three of them sit down for a meal they won't touch, and almost immediately Charity asks Tanner if she can speak to Sean alone. Rather than leaving the table with Sean, though, poor Tanner is the one who has to leave the room, which is extra awkward. Charity starts asking Sean how his family might handle a hometown date, and he assures her that she'd be met with "the love and support that I've felt my entire life."

Will she, though? Sean's dad, a former New York State Assemblyman, doesn't always put his most loving foot forward if these recent tweets are any indication. (He also has a really hard time understanding the proper use of an apostrophe.) Run, Charity. Run, and just keep on running! Don't get within 100 miles of that family.

When it's Tanner's turn, he concedes that he's had his "guards up" during this "process," in part because his past relationships haven't ended well. In fact, one woman he was dating for three years literally moved to another state after they had "one little argument." (Something tells me there is more to that story, but okay.) Now, though, Tanner says he's ready to Open Up™ again and let love in. Charity LOVES it.

But does she love it enough to give Tanner that date rose? No idea! In fact, Charity can't decide which guy she wants to send home. "I'm getting, like, a stress rash because I don't know," she confesses. "I really don't know."

After pacing around outside for a bit, Charity chooses a wise course of action: Avoidance!

"I feel like the best decision for me in this moment is to… not hand out a rose tonight," says the Bachelorette, before setting the flower back on the table. "I'll see you both very soon."

Once again, the guys have very different reactions to this twist. Tanner is happy that he gets to stick around and spend more time with Charity, while Sean is ticked off. "I'm upset," he says. "Now I'm questioning everything. How can I be so sure of something and still have this girl unsure about us?"

Back at the Royal Sonesta Hotel, Aaron is also getting a little antsy. His one-on-one date was four weeks ago, and he really needs that next date card to have his name on it. But when that knock, knock, knock comes at the door, it's Dotun who gets the prize. Two one-on-one dates in a row — congrats, king! Aaron, however, cannot hide his frustration. "It confuses me that I don't have a one-on-one here in New Orleans," he grumbles. "This is not cool… I'm f---ing pissed."

Stay mad, honey. It's Dotun's time to shine — again!

This was not technically a huju; Dotun just picked her up because it's easier for him to hug her that way since he's SO TALL. Today, Dotun and Charity will be running the Crescent City Classic 10k, complete with decorative tutus.

Ugh, I love them together so much. Just as Charity wanted, she and Dotun put the "fun" in "fun run," stopping a lot to talk to the locals and sample some snacks. After two hours and thirty-eight minutes, they cross the finish line and celebrate with a smooch.

That night, this absolutely gorgeous duo sits down for dinner and to discuss hometown dates. Dotun says he's been "excited" for his family to meet Charity since "day one," but he also admits to being scared. "I think it all kinds of stems from this fear of failure that I've had," adds Dotun, whose past failures — unclear if he means romantic, professional, or other — have left him with a few psychic scars. But now, thanks to Charity's openness and her general awesomeness, Dotun says he's learning how to "unlearn" those reflexive fears. "I'm learning sometimes a good thing is just a good thing," he says. "That's okay." And yes, Dotun does tell Charity that he's falling in love with her.

I'm not crying — you're crying! Who are we kidding? We're all crying. Give him the rose already!

Okay, I'm sorry, but these two are endgame. Let's just wrap this whole "journey" up now, folks. What's that, producers? You still owe ABC somewhere between eight and 10 hours of Bachelorette content? [Heavy sigh] Fine.

The final date of the week goes to Aaron, Xavier, Tanner, and Sean. Once again, Aaron is devastated at not getting a one-on-one.

Sorry, bro. But at least you've had a one-on-one before. Sean, as he can't stop telling us, hasn't had one yet. And once Dotun comes back to the hotel wearing a rose on his chest, Sean really starts to spiral. He even leaves the room — rude! — as Dotun is telling the guys about his date with Charity. "I'm confused. I'm frustrated. I'm mad," he says. "I don't know what else to do."

Here's an idea: Why don't you ambush Charity in her hotel room and demand that she make a decision before the final group date?

Dude, I was joking! This is a terrible idea. But you do you, I guess. "I woke up this morning and something was telling me [that] I kind of had to tell you how I was feeling," says Sean, after he and Charity sit down. Though his confidence in their relationship "has not wavered," Sean wants the Bachelorette to know that he was, like, super bummed that she's never given him a one-on-one date or even a group date rose.

Charity politely reminds him that she needs to be completely sure before she hands out a rose, especially one before hometowns — but Sean prefers to focus on what he wants. "I need an answer," he says. "The reason why I feel so passionate about this, and the reason why we've had this conversation tonight is because, like, I'm totally in the process of falling in love with you."

Oh, boy. That's all Charity needs to hear to attain the clarity she's been hoping for. Rather than lighting up at Sean's declaration, like she did with Dotun, Charity responds with a deep, heavy sigh. "Looking at it all, and understanding the magnitude of everything," she says. "There are connections that are stronger." Sean pushes back, saying that he's "confident" they can "get there" if they just had some one-on-one time. Speak for yourself, bro! Also, please read the room.

"As of right now… what you want from me, I can't give," says Charity. "And I'm very fearful of not being able to get there. I don't think that I can." Okay, Sean, you heard the lady. Please pack up your cashmere scarves and go. See you and your hair at the Men Tell All.

Smash cut to the next morning, where Charity — looking beautiful in a pink (or lavender?) dress — greets Aaron, Xavier, and Tanner for the final date of the week.

There's no real activity planned — it's just down to business with the one-on-one chats. Aaron goes first, and he informs Charity that he was in "a very low spot" emotionally earlier in the week. "The only thing that helped me get through it is just our time together," he says. Tanner, who has maintained a mature and positive attitude about everything this week, jokes with Charity about how scary it would be to have their first one-on-one date be a hometown date with his family. "But I will tell you this: I've envisioned it, and I can see you coming home," he adds. "I can see it being an amazing time."

Xavier and his fantabulous sweater go last. And boy, did this man bury the lede. "You're looking for your forever partner," says Xavier. "Today, I just wanted to be fully transparent… I think for me, like, um, it scares me to genuinely, like, commit all of myself to one person forever. That idea scares me." When Charity asks why, Xavier admits it's because "it's something I've never done before… I want to do it once; I want to do it right."

I'm sorry, is this man saying that he's never been in a monogamous relationship before? Or is he just expressing fear about getting engaged-slash-married to the wrong person? Whatever the case, Charity looks like she's about to throw up.

Meanwhile, Xavier is still talking. "Do I think I can get there? Yes. If you're the one, I don't want to pass that up," he says. "But previously, it has scared the f--- out of me."

After that, it should come as a surprise to no one that Charity gives the first date rose to Aaron. But then comes an actual shock: For the second time this week, Charity punts her decision until later. "I want you guys to know that this is actually the hardest thing that I've had to ever do," she tells Tanner and Xavier. "And for that reason, I won't be giving out a rose right now." Okay then. Cocktail party for three, anyone?

Just kidding. By that night, Charity has made her decision, so she heads over to the guy's room to break the bad news in person to… Tanner.

Yeah, that makes sense. Tanner is a nice guy, but the Bachelorette is just not feeling him. "It's hard,'" says Charity, her voice breaking. Tanner, a class act, leans forward to hold her hand, even though it's clear he's getting dumped. "I want to be able to, like, not be the person who lets you down… It really does pain me because you are truly an incredible person." 

With that, Charity walks Tanner to the elevator. "I know it was really hard on her," says Tanner, wiping away a tear. "That girl deserves the world, man. She is special." That she is, sir!

Anyhoo, it's time for Charity to put Xavier out of his pins-and-needles misery. She makes her way to his room, where Xavier is waiting in his suit. (Love that the guys had to get all dressed up, but Charity gets to hand out the roses in her casually chic jeans-and-sweater lewk.)

"I just sent Tanner home," says the Bachelorette. "I don't have to give this rose out. But… it's something that I want to do. I want to meet your family."

Nice fake out, ma'am! Despite his admitted fear of long-term commitment, Xavier gets the rose.

Well, rose lovers, we have our final four. How are you feeling about Xavier, Joey, Dotun, and Aaron? Would you like to see any of these guys as the Bachelor? And should we send out an APB on Jesse Palmer? Let me know on Twitter @KristenGBaldwin.

The Bachelorette airs Mondays at 8 p.m. ET/PT on ABC.

Sign up for Entertainment Weekly's free daily newsletter to get breaking TV news, exclusive first looks, recaps, reviews, interviews with your favorite stars, and more.

Related content:

• Bachelorette Charity Lawson says she was 'caught off guard' by Sean's visit to her room
• Bachelorette Charity Lawson on sending Brayden home: 'I was definitely way too gracious with him'
• The Bachelorette recap: The brat came back